Be Still and know

being in it- lent day 2

2012-02-23T12:01:00.000-05:00

it's one of those beautiful nights. the sun is setting wide across the sky- stretching out her arms. the air is still warm. it's one of the times you want to push pause and just be here. every little piece is magnificent. the kids are on a 'mini-break' from school, and instead of the long promised safari, i took them horseback riding- which actually was ponyback riding, but just as fun.

what i can do

2012-02-22T06:26:00.001-05:00

it's a pouring pelting cold rain and a beautiful tumultuous sky- loud and dark and pocketed with brightness and light. the earth has given way. the silence of the dry season- the quiet cracked ground-is filled with the sense of more now. it is good. today is ash wednesday. the beginning of lent- that 40 day journey to the cross- to understanding or trying to, the love of a God that led to

little gifts

2012-02-21T08:01:00.000-05:00

i love little gifts. these are the things that don't take much effort at all on the part of the giver, but mean the world to the one receiving. they aren't even known to be gifts, or meant to be gifts, but they are. it's all those little things we do for each other out of kindness or love or friendship or just because it's the right thing to do or because we wish someone would do it for us.

15 minutes of fame

2012-02-20T13:52:00.000-05:00

"In the future everyone will be famous for fifteen minutes." andy warhol i'm not sure about 15 whole minutes. but maybe if you added them all together and multiplied by some number- i would be close. it began for me at birth. yes, my adorable baby picture was book worthy. but not a book of anne geddes photographs. not a picture of me tenderly swathed in a plant or popping out of an egg.

community

2012-02-19T14:18:00.000-05:00

i'm missing the tea fields- the space of them- the time- the quiet. in kenya, i realized that something is missing. i'm missing a like minded medical community in the big sense of the word community. i didn't notice this, because in uganda, i have a community and i have a medical job. but when i came to the conference and saw groups of physicians and nurses practicing and working and living

the tea field process

2012-02-18T02:13:00.001-05:00

"Tea is the taste of my land: it is bitter and warm, strong,and sharp with memory. It tastes of longing. It tastes of the distance between where you are and where you come from. Also it vanishes-the taste of it vanishes from your tongue while your lips are still hot from the cup. It disappears,like plantations stretching up into the mist." Little Bee, Chris Cleave i'm home and it's good.

light on the inside

2012-02-15T08:50:00.000-05:00

i'm wondering if one thing most missionaries have in common is humility. (i'm not including myself in that group yet- although aspiring). as i've looked around this week, and listened, and been awed and inspired by those people around me who do things and live places that make my big move to uganda look like a weekend at the ritz- i'm astounded at the theme of humility- of giving away credit

sometimes you just need to climb a tree

2012-02-13T09:52:00.001-05:00

sometimes i forget how much i love and need alone time. i forget because i really enjoy people. after a morning and afternoon of lectures i had to run out to the tea fields again because it's just so beautiful and alone, i can hear the quiet. i also forget that i always love and connect with people who wear clogs (outside of the hospital) - it has never failed, so basically, when i go to new

uphill and down

2012-02-12T04:46:00.002-05:00

there might be nothing better than to go to bed after a day of complete physical exhaustion. that pure physical fatigue, full of sore muscles and dirt, and a free mind. that when-you-close-your-eyes-for-a-second-you-fall-asleep kind of tired. that was last night and my sleep was so sweet. yesterday we hiked up a volcano. it was about 5 km straight up to 9000 ft elevation and a few km around the

it's complicated

2012-02-11T03:34:00.000-05:00

i've done it- i've found a spot outside where the wireless works. because i just need to be outside as much as possible- so i can breath. especially on days that look and feel like today- which is, perfection. a hot sun, cool wind, some quiet birds (not those loud mocky ones around my house) the perfect temperature and hundreds of white butterflies. sometimes i feel like maria in 'the sound of

kenya photos- just a few, 'cause the internet is so slow!

2012-02-10T04:49:00.000-05:00

did anyone see the rising moon last night? an amazing giant golden ball ascending. i'm so thankful for these nights of light. i have a new camera- my dad brought it- it is our christmas gift. woo hoo! so i took a walk. and here are the tea fields. beautiful. and some children. they wanted water and anything else i had, to touch my hair, and to sing in swahili while

what's really going on here

2012-02-09T05:14:00.000-05:00

so this is day 2 of the conference- which is 10 days long. and i'm doing what i do best- or did best in college - playing hooky. actually, it's not really playing hooky- it's a well planned tactic about maximal absorption. something i became aware of too late in life- but i hold on to tightly. i have a limited attention span. i can sit still and listen, or read, and absorb information for

the tea fields

2012-02-08T11:19:00.000-05:00

the sky is growing dark, i'm drinking my milk tea and waiting for the moon. today i walked the brown snaky paths between the dotted green hills of tea and i felt exuberant, alive and full of joy and promise. the sky was so big and the tree border so tall and the green so green and the tin roofed houses down in the gardened valley shown in that perfect light of the late afternoon. i was so full

full moon

2012-02-07T14:08:00.000-05:00

so i'm here-in kenya- under a spectacular full moon. it's full in a huge way- full and promising and close and encouraging. it's lighting up the clouds in the sky like they are the platform holding her up. her perfect roundness and glow. so night isn't so so dark and scary. it's like the night has a secret- that it's opening up. it's funny that to be here feels foreign to me- even though i

top 10 list

2012-02-06T13:21:00.000-05:00

1. best recycled t-shirt worn by a ugandan: "Europeans Love Bush" 2. best TIA (this is africa !?!) moment of the week: "i'd like a dry white wine." "okay" as she scribbles something on her palm. out comes a glass of red wine. "no, i asked for a dry white wine." "well, our bar man isn't hear yet." what!?! to help you distinguish between red and white? 3. best kid moment- we're in the car on

24

2012-02-06T03:45:00.000-05:00

the taste of this milky african tea is bringing me right back to kenya. to being 17. to where i will be soon. to that great drop off into the rift valley, golden and dotted with those thin fanned acacia trees. to expanse and wild and extreme and foreign. to the voice of a place that landed me here- and i wonder why i now feel so complete- completely complete. i'm thinking about how perfect

a sunday poem

2012-02-05T12:30:00.000-05:00

The Swan Did you too see it, drifting, all night, on the black river?Did you see it in the morning, rising into the silvery air -An armful of white blossoms,A perfect commotion of silk and linen as it leanedinto the bondage of its wings; a snowbank, a bank of lilies,Biting the air with its black beak?Did you hear it, fluting and whistlingA shrill dark music - like the rain pelting the trees -

so far away so close

2012-02-04T13:46:00.000-05:00

i spent the night wrestling with a migraine then woke up foggy and went to work on a talk i'm giving in kenya next week. it's on palliative care in the developing world. as i pulled up some old talks i've given on what palliative care is, on suffering, on giving bad news, on pain management- and i realized how non-applicable much of it is here. how different the issues are. i began to

but really

2012-02-03T13:38:00.000-05:00

there are some days when i wake up and can't believe i live in east africa. most days are like this. in the good way. yesterday i noted the mess of clothes strewn across the bathroom floor and i paused. i remembered the clothes of the atlanta house floors- they were nice nice. they were picked out with much enjoyment- put together with pleasure. here i just throw on what seems to straddle

can't get enough of pablo

2012-02-02T09:03:00.002-05:00